Monday, February 4, 2013

Listening and Your Attitude

   They say that of all the information an average person has,  80% is hear say, or just passed along with no proof that it is correct by way of conversation. That means only 20% of the knowledge in an average persons brain is fact. Scary to think about now isn't it?
   Since we share so much valuable information verbally, could it be important to know how to listen with the right attitude. Truth is you will not hear a thing until your ready.  And if you have a lot on your mind you may not be ready. We may tune things out. So for fun today lets explore the six negative listening patterns:
 
1. The Faker - All the outward signs are there: Nodding, making eye contact, and giving the occasional uh huh.  However, the faker isn't concentrating on the speaker. His mind is elsewhere.
 
2. The interrupter doesn't allow the speaker to finish and doesn't ask clarifying questions or see more information from the speaker. He is too anxious to speak his words and shows little concern from the speaker.
 
3. The Intellectual or Logical Listener - This person is always trying to interpret what the speaker is saying and why. He is judging the speaker's words and trying to fit them into his logic box. He rarely asks about the underlying feeling or emotion attached to a message.

4. The Happy Hooker- The happy hooker uses the speaker's words only as a way to get to his message. When the speaker says something, and frankly, it could be anything, the happy hooker steals the focus and then changes to his own point of view, opinion, story, or facts. Favorite hooker lines are, "Oh, that's nothing, here's what happened to me" ... "I remember when I was"...

5. The Rebuttal Maker - These listener only listens long enough to make a rebuttal. His point is to use the speaker" words against him. At his worst, he is argumentative and wants to prove you wrong. At the least, the person always wants to make the speaker see the other point of view.

6. The Advice Giver- Giving advice is sometimes helpful, however, at other times, this behavior interferes with good listening, because it does not allow the speaker to fully articulate his feelings or thoughts; it doesn't help the speaker solve his own problems; it prohibits venting; it could also  belittle the speaker by minimizing his concern with a quick solution.  Well-placed advice is an important function of a salesperson. However, advice given too quickly and at the wrong time is a turnoff to the speaker.

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